real smooth

So at the grocery store last night there was one of those sample ladys with one of those mega-blenders making a smoothie. This wasn't just any smoothie though, this was a super-smoothie. She would throw in whole oranges (including peels), watermelon (with rinds), grapes, whole strawberries, whole bananas, and some other exotic things that I don't know the names of. It was really really good.

Smoothie Don'ts:

Peanut Butter Power Smoothie:
1/2 cup soy milk
1/2 cup silken tofu
1/3 cup creamy peanut butter
2 bananas — frozen
2 tablespoons chocolate syrup

Green Smoothie:
1 cup coconut milk
1.5 baby cucumbers
1 cup baby spinach
flax seeds
frozen papaya
frozen grapes
alfalfa sprouts

Pineapple, Mango and Spinach Green Smoothie:
1/2 pineapple, or about a cup of frozen pineapple chunks
1 mango, or a cup of mango frozen mango chunks
1 huge handful spinach, or to taste
1 cup water, or enough to blend to desired consistency

Banana Oatmeal Smoothie:
1 cup skim milk
1 cup orange juice
1 medium banana, coarsely chopped
1 (36 g) package quick-cooking oatmeal
3-4 ice cubes

S'more Smoothie:
1/2 cup marshmallow creme
1/4 cup chocolate syrup1 cup milk
2 cups ice
2 graham cracker squares
mini marshmallows
mini chocolate chips

Original Thanksgiving Smoothie:
1/3 pound of turkey
3 cups of mashed potatoes
5 Tbsp of gravy
2 cups of cranberry sauce
2 cups of stuffing
6 rolls
4 slices of pumpkin or pecan pie
1.5 sweet potato
1 cornucopia

Original Easter Smoothie:
5 pounds ham
2 cups of food coloring
3 chocolate bunnies
4 pints jelly beans
hard boiled eggs
cadbury creme eggs
rabbit
duck

Original Greek Smoothie:
lots of goat cheese
a hunk of lamb
5 pounds baklava
1 Rizopitta
5 cups of Skordalia
2 cups of Kotosoupa
6 Volvi me Ladoxido

Original Pizza Smoothie:
1 pound of dough
1 pepperoni
1 tsp Blue Cheese
1 tsp Brie
1 tsp Camembert
1 tsp Cheddar
1 tsp Colby
1 tsp Feta
1 tsp Goat Cheese
1 tsp Gorgonzola
1 tsp Limburger
1 tsp Manchego
1 tsp Monterrey Jack
1 tsp Parmesan
1 tsp Mozzarella
1 tsp Muenster
1 tsp Port de Salut
1 tsp Provolone
1 tsp Ricota
1 tsp Romano
1 tsp Roquefort
1 tsp Smoked Gouda
1 sardine
1 piece of sausage
1 anchovie
1 cup of sauce
1 pepper
1 onion
1 pineapple
1 slice of canadian bacon
1 shard of lettuce
1 cup of taco meat
1 chip
1 tsp garlic
1 cup of chicken
1 cup of garlic chicken
1 cup of hamburger
1 olive
1 tsp spinach
1 piece of broccoli

Original Fiesta Smoothie:
2 pounds of taco meat
3 cups of refried beans
6 pints of cheese
7 Tbsp of sour cream
as many bacon bits as you can stand
4 cups of salsa
89 cups of queso

Original German Smoothie:
beer (any amount)
9 pounds of sausage
8 cups of weiner-schnitzal
2 pounds blutwurst
3 streusels
a lot of sauerkraut

Original Christmas Smoothie:
12 pipers piping
11 drummers drumming
10 lords a leaping
9 ladies dancing
8 maids a milking
7 swans a swimming
6 geese a laying
5 golden rings
4 calling birds
3 french hens
2 turtle doves
1 partridge in a pear tree

*Original means I made it up

Smoothie Combinations:

Greek Pizza Smoothie = Grizza Smoothie:
greek smoothie + pizza smoothie

Greek Thanksgiving Smoothie = Granksgiveek Smoothie:
greek smoothie + thanksgiving smoothie

Easter Pizza Smoothie = Pizzter Smoothie:
eather smoothis + pizza smoothie

Green Peanut Butter Power Smoothie = Greenut Grutter Grower Smoothie
green smoothie + peanut butter power smoothie

Banana Oatmeal Pizza Smoothie = Boatzza Smoothie
banana oatmeal smoothie + pizza smoothie